I Wanna Run

I wanna run. Not like a marathon or even a 5k. I wanna run through the rain, I wanna run around the backyard with my dog, I wanna run up the steps at my office.

Mission

Sometimes things just hit you.  Right. Smack. In. The. Face.  You just think about life and mortality and all the things that go with it.  I’ve been thinking about it more than usual lately because my birthday is coming up.  I think about how long I’ve been on this journey, how long I’ve had cancer, how long the statistics said I had left to live.  I never wanted to read those statistics but it is hard to read about triple negative breast cancer and never come across one.  They piss me off.  There should be a spoiler alert before they blurt out that shit.  Besides I’ve already broken through their shoddy math.  I plan on continuing to do that.  I plan on living.  I am living.  Every day I get up and I think, “I am going to live.”  I rarely think about dying, that’s for old people and I’m not even 34.  It’s barely a question in my mind anymore – living or dying.  I’ve been feeling really good lately and I’ve learned something about myself – my will to live is strong.  I’ve already defied the odds.  I have great doctors and I just feel like one day they will tell me they’ve got something new for me and it will do the trick.  It will kill this beast inside of me and I will win.